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Who has most influenced you the most creatively, and how?

Mostly when I write my influences come from the people around me. I like to steal characters of real life humans. Then I mold them into a situation I like. Man, pathetic. I used to think this idea was nice. I mean sometimes things just don't work out the way you want them too and a story can fix things. Like the book Atonement.

I guess I'm not sure one person has influenced me the most. Maybe it's partically because I don't feel like I've ever acomplished anything worth it. I mean if someone influenced me to finish my work than I think that person would be the one that influenced me the most creatively.

In general, I like the people that push me. I like a challenge. I alway have relationships on my mind which is why this connection relates to my personal response but in this world I've been stagnant. I read He's Just Not That Into You, I have faith in there theory. It just that I feel like I'm missing out on a something when I don't have a person there who encourages me and listens to me. I've frequently thought that I've just been a late bloomer like this is my High School ordeal in college. Having one relationship that totally didn't work at all. What I'm trying to get at is whether I should take risks. I need to stop thinking and take more action.

Anyway, I've been in a constant failure all day today. I accidently did horrible damage to my jeans, I couldn't take a nap, and now I'm at this all night write and all I've managed to do is write a little bit of nothing, and failed at answering this question to a journal promt. I can't focus and I'm worried someelse horrible is going to happen. I'm holding back when I might most likely be able to create something spectaclar. I think I have an idea now. Not a very good one but I think it something.

Now, finally has most influenced me the most creatively. Well I've been writing for as long as I can remember and it's always been more of an escape for me than anything else. No one has ever been able to push me out of my confort zone...I'm sorry I'm failing...I think I'm starting to fall...Hold my mouse and I'll...hold yours.

That's the only thing I've been able to write all night and it doesn't make any sence at all.


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